


it goes without saying

by sajere1



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure, Digimon Adventure Zero Two | Digimon Adventure 02
Genre: Bisexual Koushirou, Canon Compliant, Gay Taichi, M/M, Transgender Koushirou, WE HAVE REAL TAGS NOW BOYS
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-09-17 03:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 12,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9302738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sajere1/pseuds/sajere1
Summary: A bunch of quick fics from various points in the canon timeline about, amongst other things, Taichi Gayami, what exactly the Adventure kids were up to during 02, Koushiro Izumi's steady hurtle towards a mental breakdown, and Sora Takenouchi, Done With Your Shit.





	1. Between 2.3 and 2.4

It’s been a while since Kōshirō could just go to the Digital World at whim. Sure, he’s been there - the whole Milleniummon debacles, when they’d been called to release their crests, when he’d parsed the coded instructions in the programs Gennai sent him and found the gate that opened on its own – once in a while, they went for a day or so. But they’ve always been limited by what the Digital World lets them do. Kōshirō wasn’t sure what, exactly, opened the gate, and without anywhere to start had never been able to figure it out. They’d been limited to video calls and the occasional surprise visit for three years.

His theory on the new digivices was correct, though. Not only could they open the gates just by asking one of the younger kids to be in the room – something that they usually did with minimal grumbling, other than Miyako, who did it with rather loud and excessive grumbling – but, if Kōshirō could dissect one and analyze the differences between it and his own Digivice, he might be able to figure out what exactly caused the gate to open. 

Soon. Right now – bigger problems.

It’s probably not safe for him to be in the Digital World right now, since Tentomon can’t digivolve and some kid is running around trying to kill anything with a skeletal system (do plant Digimon have a skeletal system? Maybe there’s a way to check without dissection – have to look into it), but it’s nighttime and he trusts Tailmon’s judgment on his safety. Anyway, his position is defensible, hard to find, a little alcove tucked into a cave tucked into the crack of a mountain, his base of operations for those months when Taichi had disappeared and they’d all gone their separate ways.

His notebook is indecipherable to anyone else, a mess of sketches and scribbles and sometimes the answer to a math problem he’d come up with three weeks ago and suddenly solved, but he’s fairly certain any of the other DigiDestined could get a grasp on it by glancing; they all know the crests by heart now.

If he could just talk to Gennai, maybe he’d get some direct answers. If Gennai just _gave them a way to contact him_ instead of being a vague, distant figure all of the time, then things would be so much easier.

But they aren’t.

This isn’t helping. Kōshirō leans his head back against the cool rock, resting his arm on his knee. He sort of wishes he’d brought his computer, and he will next time, but for brainstorming theories, this is better – less opportunity to get distracted. He doesn’t have the threat of potential death to motivate him the way he did a few years ago. And after those last days, when Mugendramon had tracked them on his laptop…when he’d almost gotten them all killed –

Well. The notebook would do for now.

“Kōshirō!” a voice calls, distant, and Kōshirō jolts, instinctively reaches for his Digivice – and then another yell of “Kōshirō, where are you?” and he relaxes.

“In here, Taichi-san!” Kōshirō yells back. There’s a moment’s pause, and then Kōshirō’s Digivice starts to beep as another one comes towards him; within moments Taichi comes into view, his face ghostly in the light of Kōshirō’s electric lantern.

“Jeez, Kōshirō, how did you find this place? And why are you all the way back here?” Kōshirō instinctively scoots over, and Taichi slides in next to him; it’s cramped, but nice, in the sort of way that Taichi’s ridiculous body warmth pressing against his side is always nice. It reminds him a little of when they were kids, hiding beneath the tires in the park – though they’re somewhat larger now.

“It was one of the places we stayed when searching for Gennai. I thought it wise to go deep in, since Tentomon is sleeping, and I can’t exactly fight any evil Digimon myself.” Kōshirō shrugs, jostling them both in the process.

“Oh.” Taichi’s voice is slow, the way it always is when they bring up those months he’d disappeared. “What are you working on?”

Kōshirō’s shoulders go a little straighter. “I’m trying to figure out those eggs that the younger DigiDestined picked up,” he says. “The ones with our crests on them.”

“I’ve been wondering about that, too.” Taichi’s lips are curled down, the type of hard expression that he’s only started perfecting recently. “Why couldn’t we pick them up, but Takeru and Hikari could?”

“Right!” Kōshirō nods. “And, in addition – what are they, exactly? How do they have our crests on them? Logically, they must have been created at some point before we arrived at the Digital World, since our crests were either in our possession our destroyed by Apocalymon since then – but when? When Gennai had them? During a transfer between Piemon and the hiding spots? Or is it something Piemon created?” He points the edge of his pen at some notes in the corner of the page. “And the process of Armor Evolution. That’s strange, too. I wondered, at first, if they functioned the way the crests worked for us, but physically speaking, it appears as though they actually integrate the eggs into their physiology – similar, I think, to how WarGreymon and MetalGarurumon became Omnimon, back during the Diaboromon battle.”

Taichi blinks. “So the eggs are Digimon?”

“Or at least recognized as Digimon in the evolution process,” Kōshirō allows, flipping his pen between his fingers as he speaks. “I’m not exactly sure on how it works yet, but I have theories – I’m going to bring my laptop to school tomorrow and ask one of the younger kids to let me see their devices, figure out if I can connect them somehow and investigate through there. Miyako-kun will probably let me use hers. And if I can figure that out – “ he looks up, and abruptly his hands stop spinning. “What, is something wrong?”

Taichi immediately yanks his eyes away from where he’s been staring at Kōshirō’s face, hiding his expression behind his sleeve. “Nothing,” he says, in a tone that Kōshirō has come to recognize as his I’m Lying To Save Face tone, which usually only comes out when fighting Sora or pretending not to be hovering over Hikari. But then – “I just…haven’t seen you this excited about anything. In a while. It’s nice.”

Koushirou stares. “O-oh,” he says, and his face is going red for no reason. “Thank you. Taichi-san.”

Taichi pulls his arm down to smile, weakly, his face probably as red as Kōshirō’s is. And then Taichi says, “Oh, yeah, and I’m actually here because Hikari said she needed to go to bed and you should go back.”

Kōshirō blinks. “You – “ He sits straight up. _“What!”_

“I forgot!” Taichi defends, and his smile isn’t even approaching sheepish, the bastard, “It slipped my mind, you were having such a good time!”

“You – oh, no, Hikari-kun thinks – extremely rude – I cannot believe – “ This time, when he hits Taichi with his shoulder, it’s entirely on purpose. _“You_ are explaining this to her!”

Taichi is borderline laughing now. “I think I can manage that,” he promises, tossing his legs over the side and standing, rolling his neck until it cracks as Kōshirō stands behind him – and when he turns and tosses his usual smug grin over his shoulder, Kōshirō’s face goes just a little redder for no reason at all, dammit. “Let’s head out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyoooo
> 
> i've been working on a Very Serious 02 Epilogue Project and in between doing that, have spent a lot of time yelling into the void about taishiro, which has included writing a bunch of ficlets that are Useless Everywhere, Forever, To Anyone But Me
> 
> so take them
> 
> if you ever wanted to hear about other projects or just listen to me shouting about how much i love all the digidestined forever, feel free to hit me @ my tumblr transkoushirou


	2. Between 2.09 and 2.10

Koushirou is the one who tells Taichi.

Hikari is out with the others – probably intentionally, trying to avoid her brother’s inevitable explosion – but Koushirou didn’t want to say it over text. Taichi deserves better than that. Agumon deserves better than that.

“The Digimon Kaiser has Agumon,” Taichi says, slow, like he’s waiting for Koushirou to correct him.

But Koushirou can’t. It’s the worst kind of nightmare. “Yes.”

“And he was forced to evolve to SkullGreymon.”

“Yes.”

Taichi nods, thoughtful. Then he turns and kicks his closet so hard the door cracks at the edges.

“Taichi-san!” He does it again. Koushirou grabs his arm and yanks back. “Taichi-san, stop!”

_“Fuck!_ ” Taichi yells, burying his hands in his hair. It’s the first time Koushirou’s ever heard him say anything worse than “damn.” “Fuck, fuck, I can’t believe, fuck, no – “

“Taichi-san, please, you’ll hurt yourself!” Koushirou bullies him into sitting on the lower bunk and drops to his knees, yanking the shoe off the foot he kicked with; Taichi’s fists are clenched into the fabric of his pants. His entire body is shaking, and he has a nasty bruise on his toe where he kicked it – bright red, and starting to bleed where his toenail shoved into the skin. “Here, let me get a first aid kit, I’ll be right back – “

“Please don’t leave,” Taichi says, and Koushirou looks up and Taichi is about to punch him or the wall or someone and –

_\- and SkullGreymon breaks the arena with one foot, and he’s looking at them but he isn’t seeing anything but death and destruction and an empty ribcage, his missiles pointing at each of them in turn, and Taichi’s crest is dark, pitch black –_

“Please,” Taichi says again, and his voice cracks.

Koushirou sits down, opens his arms, and lets Taichi crumple into his shoulder.


	3. Immediately Post-Kaiser

What happens is: they all get back from camp and sleep for a week.

Except Kōshirō, who gets back from camp, sleeps for one hour, wakes up, and yells, “THE CAVES.”

“Hafusd,” Taichi says, blearily looking up; they’re all dispersed across various pieces of furniture in Yamato’s bedroom, too tired to bother getting home just now when sleep so available right here, but Kōshirō just flaps a hand at him, already pulling out his laptop. “Theory,” he says, and Taichi knows how those go and he’s honestly too drowsy to listen to Kōshirō’s usual info dumps right now, so he just mutters some assent and rolls back over, leaving Kōshirō to his work.

Five hours later, Yamato opens the door with a bang, startling at least three kids awake and getting a particularly loud snore from Miyako. “Yamato-san!” Kōshirō says, looking up and smiling. “Good, I’ve been waiting – I have a couple of questions, if you don’t mind.”

Yamato blinks, Jun’s voice still ringing in his ears. “Have you slept?”

“Unimportant. Do you remember those caves of darkness you and Sora-san created, back when the Dark Masters were attacking us?”

“Uh, yeah.” Yamato sets his bag to the side. Taichi, who is only just sitting up to rub his eyes, scoots when Yamato gestures, letting him take a seat next to Kōshirō on the bed. “What do you need to know?”

“Do you think,” Kōshirō says, “that if we went to the Digital World, you could point out where you created them?”

“Maybe,” Yamato allows. “It’d probably be easier if Sora were there to help, though.”

“I’d rather do it with each of you individually to avoid group biases,” Kōshirō says, pulling up a map of blocks on the Digital World. “It’s imperative that we try to find it out – I should be able to find a point close to it.”

“Why?” Taichi says, leaning dangerously over Yamato’s personal space to get a glance at Kōshirō’s computer screen.

“I have a theory,” Kōshirō says.

“Big surprise, Kōshirō has a theory, yadda yadda, shut uuup,” Daisuke whines, rolling away from them on the carpet.

“A theory about what?” Yamato says, and Daisuke groans.

“The Dark Ocean,” Kōshirō says, and everyone in the room sits up.

“ACK,” Miyako yelps, as Hikari’s sudden movement dislodges her, rolling into the door where she bangs her head. “Ow! What’s going on?”

“The Dark Ocean?” Takeru says, looking at Kōshirō with his hand clenched in the carpeting.

“I’m still working on it,” Kōshirō says, tapping at his keyboard. “And some tenants are predicated on the location of the caves relative to the location of the whirlpool. But – maybe.” Yamato watches as he executes a complicated string of code, different squares of the map highlighting sporadically before it settles on one, long beyond the bounds of documented location. “There!” Kōshirō points. “If I’m right, and assuming my equation is correct, that should be where it is. Would you mind checking with me at some point, Yamato?”

“Hold on,” Takeru protests. “I thought we were going to start rebuilding the Digital World?”

Taichi and Kōshirō exchange a Look. “We’ll do double duty,” Taichi says finally. “Older kids on theory work, younger kids on rebuilding. Now that the Kaiser’s down, the Dark Ocean – and whatever’s going on with it – is our top priority unless another enemy shows themselves.”

“Are you sure, Taichi-san?” Daisuke says. “If you want to be in the thick of things…”

“It’ll be fine!” Taichi grins. “We’ll all be getting work done, and if we finish this fast, we can join you guys.”

“Can we go back to sleep now,” Iori grumbles, head pillowed on Upamon’s still-snoring form.

“Please do, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Kōshirō says.

Taichi rolls his eyes, exchanging glances with Yamato, who stands with a groan. Then – in one swift movement – Yamato grabs Kōshirō’s laptop form his hands in tandem with Taichi wrapping his arms around Kōshirō’s waist and yanking him to lay down on the bed.

“Hey!” Kōshirō says. “Guys, what – “

“Get some rest,” Taichi mutters into the mattress, as Yamato sets the computer down on his desk. Kōshirō makes a valiant effort to wriggle out of Taichi’s grip, which ends with Taichi yanking him even closer. “But – “ Kōshirō protests.

“Get some sleep, dammit, save the world tomorrow,” Taichi groans, now so close that his breath is warm on Koushirou’s neck. Koushirou finally relents with some passive-aggressive muttering, relaxing under Taichi's arm, and closing his eyes.

He’s out within the first minute. Taichi looks up just in time to find Hikari snickering and taking a picture of them, so he pulls up the covers before he snuggles in closer against Koushirou’s back.


	4. Tri: Saikai

The text comes at 3 in the morning.

Kōshirō jolts awake immediately – kicks out, instinctively, and jerks up in bed. “Kōshirō-han?” Tentomon murmurs sleepily at the foot of the bed, but Kōshirō is already sitting up, eyes wide.

He’s normally not even asleep yet by this time – busy crunching number for Wallace’s business, researching theoretical particle physics for fun, banging his head against the screen trying to drag answers out of himself because if he just thinks a little harder, goes a little further, if he just if he _just_ – but he’d almost collapsed at around midnight, his whole skin vibrating after the airport battle. Which is stupid, because now they know Digimon are coming in and out for suspicious reasons, of course more would come tonight, what was he thinking, everyone’s probably out dueling some DarkMegaHerkalesWereTyrannomon or something and he’s missing it –

_TEXT FROM: Taichi-san._

_Walk with me?_

Kōshirō stops.

Oh.

A different kind of emergency.

+x+

Taichi is already there when Kōshirō arrives, twisting the ropes of the swingset between his fingers. They’d officially labelled this park the “designated freak out over Daisuke” spot back when they were in middle school – because inevitably, that was where most of their worries over Hikari’s gang seemed to stem from – but he and Taichi had discovered the summer after It that the park had other uses, if you were careful to make sure no one caught you trespassing.

“Taichi-san,” Kōshirō says – hushed, to let Taichi know he’s here more than anything else. Taichi grunts in response, eyes trained to where he’s toeing the dirt. His nail picks a strand off one of the ropes. Kōshirō watches.

Finally, Taichi stands up, shrugging his jacket down into a slouch. Taichi is not the type of person to ever look small, no matter how he feels. He just looks…quiet.

Taichi leads them out the park, because Taichi always leads, and Kōshirō waits until they’ve hit the corner of the block to say, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Taichi is quiet for a moment. “I don’t know,” he says finally, turning the corner; Kōshirō jogs to keep pace. “It was…” he shakes his head. “I don’t know. It’s been…a while.”

“A year and a half, actually,” Kōshirō says, and Taichi manages a funny little snort that is better than quiet so Kōshirō smiles at it anyway.

“Of course you’d know that,” Taichi smiles, and Kōshirō can feel him sinking into his own bones again, back into the weight of their repertoire. “Surprised you even knew what I meant when I texted. Or that you were awake to get it.” Taichi’s voice resonates the sort of proud disapproval that comes when Kōshirō does anything in the general vein of mild rebellion. “You should get to sleep earlier.”

“I was asleep, but thanks for worrying, _Sora-san,”_ Kōshirō snorts. Taichi grins and bumps their shoulders together. “I woke up because I turn my phone volume up before I go to sleep at night. In case you need me.”

He senses rather than sees Taichi’s surprise. “Even after a year?”

Kōshirō casts him the usual _Taichi-san, if I weren’t so polite I’d call you a fucking idiot_ look. “Taichi-san, I’m always available for you.”

There’s a moment of silence. “Oh,” Taichi says, finally, subdued.

They turn another corner. They walk another block in silence.

“It was about SkullGreymon,” Taichi says, finally. “That was what the dream was about. I mean. If you still. Want to hear about it.”

“I do,” Kōshirō says, not because he wants to hear but because he wants Taichi to feel better, and Taichi has no outlet but rambling slurs of concepts, has tried working out his friction with violence and found no reprieve, and Kōshirō is here. Kōshirō is always here.

“It was – I was, maybe, eight, or so,” Taichi says, and his voice is all stutter and crack, “and I was taking Agumon outside to play soccer, even though Mom told me not to, and he digivolved into SkullGreymon and then – then we were in the Digital World, it doesn’t make sense, it was a dream, and then months passed and SkullGreymon picked up Yamato, and Sora, a-and that girl from earlier, with the glasses, and he – “ Taichi shuts his eyes, feet stumbling; Kōshirō puts a hand on his elbow to support him, and Taichi keeps going, can’t stop himself now – “he killed her, and then I was SkullGreymon, and I – I – “

And that’s it. It’s been a long time, but Kōshirō remembers the signs, the slow chugging stop of Taichi’s speeches. This one is more transparent than most of the dreams are.

“I’m here,” Kōshirō says, quiet, and his hand goes from Taichi’s elbow down to his fingers, ghosting over the scars on his knuckles. Kōshirō’s got matching ones ripped across his right forearm – their matching tokens from the debris of Mugendramon’s bombs. Kōshirō’s hand travels from there to the forearm where Shellmon left lines of bruises that Kōshirō remembers all too vividly, and then to his back, the circle scar that Angewomon’s arrow left. “We’re all here. I’m here.”

Taichi leans into Kōshirō’s touch. “Yeah.” Taichi breathes out, long, and shuts his eyes against the night. “Yeah.”

They finish the loop back to the park in silence.

Kōshirō doesn’t take his hand off Taichi’s back.


	5. Immediately After Adventure

The return to school comes with the disappointing revelation that countless months in a hellish warzone does not excuse you from homework if the teacher doesn’t believe you, which means that all of them – even Jō, who had been working nonstop since they returned – are up all night frantically finishing their worksheets the night before returning.

Two hours of sleep isn’t the worst Kōshirō’s ever gotten, of course; those first days striking off to search for Gennai had been kickstarted with a 72-hour paranoia-induced sleeplessness, which had ended in Tentomon (and he can think of Tentomon now without crying, sort of, as long as it’s only in passing) dragging him into a nearby cave when he collapsed. Frankly, two hours of sleep on a real bed outdoes eight hours on rock, in terms of his situational awareness. He feels rather proud of how well he keeps his balance when he walks into class and takes his usual seat, middle right, halfway to the back.

Mimi is in class, already, which never happened before – she used to spend all her time before class gossiping, not organizing her pencils and counting her breaths. Takeru should just be getting to his school in Kawata; Sora and Yamato are likely both already in their classrooms, and Taichi is probably running late with Hikari complaining about it next to him. Jō, Kōshirō thinks, has probably been in class since four this morning, and has spent the whole time worried that the reason no one’s there is because he’s late.

He catches himself smiling and shoves it down, fixing his expression into proper polite interest for the lesson. He didn’t used to be this aware of his friends. He didn’t use to be this aware of anyone.

Mimi looks up, suddenly, and catches his eye. They stare at each other for a long moment – they haven’t had contact since they got back and Mimi’s parents drove her off in tears. She had seemed so intent to forget everything that had happened…it had just seemed rude to do anything to remind her of it, even out of concern.

She smiles at him. He lets out the breath he’d been holding and smiles back, waving.

+x+

The day’s lesson is on the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and Kōshirō gets through fourteen seconds of it before he collapses on the floor next to his chair.

+x+

Four hours later, Kōshirō wakes up to the sound of Mimi screaming her head off.

“Yelling isn’t going to help!” Yamato snaps irritably, but Kōshirō can only barely hear him over the shouting of what’s wrong with him, let us in, why are you keeping it from us, is he going to die!

Die gets his attention. He sits up, ruffling his own hair quickly – tactile sensation is still a go. He knows what collapsing out of exhaustion was like, that wasn’t it; he ate breakfast this morning, he doesn’t have any medical conditions. His breathing is – 

Erratic. He’s hyperventilating, he checks and his pulse his racing, he closes his eyes and sees bright spots and there is screaming in the next room and he can’t think.

What happened? Why did he black out?

He thinks back. The movie started. Grainy film, an announcer, pilots and –

Bombs. The sound of bombs.

Mugendramon.

It all rushes back with startling clarity – hearing the bombs and smelling the city, the feel of the sidewalk beneath him, Taichi’s hands and breath on his collar slamming him against the floor, the blood that seeped through this shorts where debris sliced up his leg and the taste of it in his mouth where he slammed his head falling down down _down._ The computer Mugendramon tracked them on. The computer Mugendramon tracked them on that was his fault.

The bombs that were his fault.

He forces his eyes open before he can get sucked back into the memory – the white hot flash of being there that had put him out, disturbingly vivid, but distorted somehow, like going through a nightmare you’d already been through, knowing what came next but being powerless to stop it. He rubs his hands together. They feel cold.

Mimi is still screaming in the next room, and if he hears the voice that’s rising properly, Taichi’s on his way to joining her. Kōshirō’s legs are shaky when he stands, and it takes a couple of tries to control his grip enough to grab the door handle.

He opens the door to find six kids, one of whom is clearly on the phone with his little brother, facing down one terrified-looking school nurse.

“Excuse me,” Kōshirō says, and his voice is raspy like maybe he just coughed his lungs out through his eyes, and everyone turns to look at him all at once.

“Kōshirō!” Jou shouts, his spine losing its tensed curve, at the same time the nurse says, “I told you he was alright, now if you will please wait – “

“We’ll take it from here,” Taichi says, kicking the door open and grabbing Kōshirō by the elbow, dragging him out while the nurse makes indignant noises behind them.

Kōshirō doesn’t quite want to protest, but he feels obligated on behalf of the nurse – except that his mouth tastes like Chuumon crawled in it and died and he can’t quite catch his breath and he still has the sounds of the city rumbling down his throat and the whole team is frogmarching him down the road. “This’ll do,” Taichi decides, and turns into a small playground that the others file into. Even after they sit at the bench, Taichi’s hand doesn’t leave his elbow, grip tight and knuckles white.

“Let me check on you, you look clammy,” Jou says, hurrying over to brush Koushirou’s hair out of his eyes; he goes through the motions of checking Koushirou’s pulse almost methodically, carefully examining his patient.

“We could’ve just let the nurse check him out,” Sora says as Jou starts to walk Koushirou through deep breathing exercises to slow down his heart rate.

“No, we couldn’t have,” Taichi says, his grip still tight on Koshirou’s arm.

“He’s right,” Yamato says; he’s set his call to Takeru on speakerphone, the cell phone carefully perched on the slide next to him. “Anyone who wasn’t there wouldn’t know what to do with us.”

“I don’t care as long as we’re all okay!” Mimi says, voice shrill and fists tight. She wipes her eyes, lip trembling.

“Better,” Jou says after checking Kōshirō’s pulse a second time. He lets go, crouching down, leaning back on his ankles; Hikari is fluttering around nervously, like she wants to help but isn’t quite sure how. “So. What happened?”

Kōshirō looks away. Taichi loosens the grip on his arm just enough to be comforting.

“We were watching a movie and it had bombs,” Kōshirō says. “It reminded me of the metal city.”

“Oh, Kōshirō,” Sora breathes as Jou and Yamato trade confused looks.

“What does that mean!” Mimi demands, looking like she might just stamp her foot and refuse to move if they go any further.

“When we all got separated fighting the Dark Masters, we found this city where Mugendramon was,” Takeru pipes up, voice small and tinny through the phone; at the name _Mugendramon,_ Koushirou shivers, and Sora rests her hand on the shoulder opposite Taichi’s side, rubbing her thumb soothingly against his neck. “He bombed every building to try to kill us!”

“He tracked us down to try to kill us,” Kōshirō says, and his voice is quiet and flat and they all look up, like they aren’t quite sure he’s really talking. “He bombed every building because I tried to outsmart him and failed. There’s a difference.”

“That’s not what happened,” Taichi says.

“Yes, it is.”

Taichi sighs, and leans in against Koushirou’s shoulder, and Koushirou closes his eyes and focuses on the points of contact – the line up his arm (not his leg, not the scar that won’t heal up his calf) where Taichi is warm against him, the smooth circle against his collarbone where Sora is keeping rhythm. “It’s not,” Taichi says, “but that’s not what’s important right now. How did the reminder black you out?”

“It – “ Koushirou falters. “It was. It was like I was there. I was in class and then the bomb went off and then I was, in the bushes, and – I mean.” He swallows. “Reminded was the wrong word. I think. Sorry.”

“I think I’ve heard of this,” Jou says, pushing up his glasses. “Flashess…? Flashbackwards? Something like that. It’s a thing for war veterans – I helped my brother study them in his psychology class.”

“But will it be okay?” Hikari says, wrapping her fingers around one another just to do something.

Jou smiles, tired, and Taichi squeezes Kōshirō’s elbow. “Probably not,” Jou says. “Things like this might happen again – maybe for all of us. They’re supposed to be pretty common after something traumatic happens.”

They sit in silence for a moment.

“We didn’t go through anything traumatic,” Mimi says suddenly, staring at her hands. “Did we? It’s not like we’re war veterans.”

“We watched people die,” Jou says, “often in our place. Mimi, you had a mental break because it got so bad. We were explicitly told that the fate of the universe depended on our success.” He sighs. “It wasn’t a war, I’ll give you that – or at least, not a traditional one. But I don’t think it’s fair to say we weren’t victims.”

“But – we were needed,” Sora says. “They wouldn’t have called for us if we weren’t.”

“They couldn’t call for adults who knew what they were doing?” Yamato says, crossing his arms. “Or even given us a choice about whether we wanted to go!”

Fighting. Taichi yelling, blood on his leg, screams and flashes and bombs and bombs –

“Let’s talk about it later,” Taichi says suddenly, his hand tense the same way Kōshirō’s body is. “One step at a time, yeah?”

“Right now what’s important is that we’re all okay,” Sora nods. Kōshirō looks down at his own hands.

They’re all okay.

He reaches over and squeeze’s Taichi’s hand where it’s on top of his arm, and he finally takes a moment to breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one might actually get slightly jossed by the next episode of tri, but ive always thought that the reason koushiro didn't have a more major role in the metal city episode of 02 - which, otherwise, is a near-flawless callback to the mugendramon episodes (hikari in trouble, taichi freaking out trying to find her, andromon seeming like an enemy at first but ultimately helping them) - was probably because the metal city is a really, really bad place for koushiro in terms of memories; it's the place where his actions almost indirectly got everyone killed, and i dont think he'd take that likely. its the root of a lot of his later dynamic with taichi, too, imo, but thats a meta for another time.
> 
> this one is a little less focused on taishiro than the others, and just based on the way my 02 drabbles have been leaning so far (explaining the general happenings of the 02 kids, Where The Fuck Has Sora Been This Whole Goddamn Season, etc), they'll probably start leaning away even further on a couple more. i'm trying to at least include both of them in each drabble, for posterity's sake, but i apologize to anyone whos just here for The Gays. i promise thats still a thing, my dudes.


	6. Taichi's Last Year of Middle School

Text Archives: November 2003

_cooler goggle guy_  
Hey Sora  
I have  
a query 

_tennis mom_  
That is not a word I expected to be in your vocabulary. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
RUDE  
How could u expect me to spend more than 2 minutes of my life w/ Kōshirō and not learn a shitload of useless vocabulary 

_tennis mom_  
God, you’re so right.  
Anyway, what do you need? 

_cooler goggle guy_  
okay actually  
less of a query more of a confession  
two confessions  
the whole query business was a lie meant to trick u into listening. My master plan, executed 

_tennis mom_  
I’m listening, Taichi. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
right.  
okay, so you know last year, when u and Yamato started dating  
and Jō was freakin out because he thought I liked u  
and Daisuke was like…..DAMN TAICHI MISSED HIS CHANCE 

_tennis mom_  
I remember. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
OR  
better segway  
remember when I sent you the e-mail with the heart by accident and everyone was like “go for it Sora it’s proof he likes you!”  
and it was like. Totally an accident 

_tennis mom_  
Taichi, is this just you complaining about all of the times people thought we were dating? 

_cooler goggle guy_  
YES BUT HOLD ON I PROMISE IT MAKES SENSE  
so I was thinking, like  
why DIDN’T I like you  
because I mean you’re one of my best friends? and I trust absolutely no one more than I trust you?  
and no offence but you’re very pretty 

_tennis mom_  
None taken. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
and I was like gosh darn diddly young dumb Taichi it is literally the ideal set-up for romance  
and I did some thinking about it  
and also a little thinking about Yamato  
and confession #1  
I think I’m gay? 

_tennis mom_  
Oh.  
Like, exclusively into guys? 

_cooler goggle guy_  
yeah? I mean like, tentatively  
idk I’ve never SEEN a girl and felt like…yeah. that’s a body I’d like to make out with  
that sounded weird 

_tennis mom_  
So what you’re saying is, you have seen boys you want to make out with. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
okay yeah that’s confession #2  
but before we go any further down that road can I get some of the stereotypical coming out bffs validation  
because logically I know we’re cool, since Yamato’s bi and everybody’s cool w/ that  
but like emotionally  
this conversation is sort of a struggle? 

_tennis mom_  
Oh my God, yes, I’m so sorry.  
I was going to wait until after both confessions were done so I could lump the answer together.  
But of course we’re okay, Taichi. You’re my best friend, and I love you more than anything in the world. Love is sort of my whole thing. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
thank u  
sorry that was dumb but I appreciate it 

_tennis mom_  
It’s not dumb!! It’s really hard to talk about, and I’m honestly really happy you came to me about it. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
gay  
ok so anyway  
I know I am interested in guys because  
CONFESSION #2 ALERT  
I’ve been thinking lightly that I might have a crush on Kōshirō? 

_tennis mom_  
… 

_cooler goggle guy_  
and like, I maybe have had a crush on him? for a while?  
like I don’t even KNOW how long I was just looking at him while we were hangin out and I was like  
Oh  
That’s what it’s like to want to kiss people 

_tennis mom_  
jskdfaljfd 

_cooler goggle guy_  
Uh  
Sora are you okay  
did I kill you 

_tennis mom_  
Hold on.  
Taking your time to come to me about this, I understand. That’s fine. Take things at your own pace.  
But Taichi, are you telling me that you didn’t realize you were interested in Kōshirō until just now? 

_cooler goggle guy_  
I mean I’ve been thinking about it for a while now?  
like def a few weeks, maybe a few months 

_tennis mom_  
Taichi.  
Taichi, oh my God. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
what 

_tennis mom_  
You are. The worst. Oh my god. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
WHAT 

_tennis mom_  
Let me get this straight.  
After exchanging chocolates with Kōshirō-kun every Valentine’s Day for five years.  
And spending WEEKS yelling at me about how good his haircut looked instead of doing homework.  
And never, ever having a Christmas party, because every year the two of you want on some gross sports-related date that couldn’t be disturbed by the rest of us or it would ruin the sanctity of the event or whatever.  
After YEARS of that.  
You never considered be romantic interest??? 

_cooler goggle guy_  
I THOUGHT THAT’S WHAT ALL STRAIGHT PEOPLE DID WITH THEIR FRIENDS 

_tennis mom_  
YOU DIDN’T DO IT WITH YAMATO 

_cooler goggle guy_  
YEAH CAUSE HE WAS DOIN IT WITH YOU 

_tennis mom_  
T A I C H I 

_cooler goggle guy_  
ok one the valentine’s thing was so Kōshirō would know I was cool with the gender stuff I am calling strict no homo policy on that one  
two  
I hate 2 break this 2 u Sora  
but I am not a smart man 

_tennis mom_  
As I keep discovering, tragically. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
…BUT YOU’RE COOL WITH IT 

_tennis mom_  
TAICHI YES OF COURSE I’M COOL WITH IT YOU’RE MY BEST FRIEND 

_cooler goggle guy_  
:D 

_tennis mom_  
No. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
:D  
:D :D :D :D 

_tennis mom_  
I hate you. 

_cooler google guy_  
……  
……………  
……………….:D 

_tennis mom_  
Get some sleep, Taichi. 

_cooler goggle guy_  
yeah alright mom 

_tennis mom_  
…………………….:D 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the valentine's day thing is a brief reference to a different little prompt that i've had rolling around my head for a while now, but to clarify, when i say "gender thing" in the story i tend to be referencing the fact that i write koushiro is trans. i am, at this point, so used to this as my own canon that i just forgot to say anything about it, and it just happened not to come up in the story yet? so uh. My B
> 
> i would also briefly like to apologize for the anachronistic nature of the messaging style of 2017 being projected backwards into 2003. i was not active on any message boards or anything until the very late 2000's, so i am neither familiar with the appropriate style nor fully capable of divesting myself of my modern-era associations w/ casual text discussion; this, unfortunately, sacrifices some of the realisticness of the timeline, and for that i apologize.
> 
> MOSTLY, though, i wanted to say that this dumb chapter is going up 90% because i wanted one last update before my time got taken over for femslash february, which i cherish dear 2 my heart as a great excuse to yell about my girls. this might update before the end of the month, but i would not bank on it, so i wanted to get at least one more thing up before that came.


	7. Between Daisuke/Ken's Jogress and the Kyoto Episode

“Ken! You have a friend over!” Mrs. Ichijouji hollers, and Ken's back goes rigid in his school chair.

“Maybe it’s Motomiya-kun!” Minomon says, cheerfully hopping on the bed, but Ken’s got a hand on his Digivice, standing slowly. “Let them in, please!” Ken calls to his mother, the other hand tight on his keyboard, setting up a Digital Gate in case he needs a quick escape –

Then the door opens, and a middle schooler with a great shock of red hair walks in.

“You should have warned me you were having someone over, Ken, I would’ve made more for dinner!” Mom gushes. Ken is busy staring down this kid – short, even shorter than Ken himself, and thin, with the sort of gangly falling of his limbs like he wouldn’t know what to do with himself in a fight – and trying to figure out who he is and what the fuck he’s doing in Ken’s room, when the kid subtly tugs on the bottom of his jacket just enough to reveal a Digivice.

Oh. So the non-fighting stance is a lie, then.

“I’m sorry, Mama, I forgot.” Ken smiles, and she beams at the word _mama,_ like always, and his heart pumps a little better for it. “I’ll warn you next time.”

“I didn’t intend to be a burden, Ichijouji-san,” Red Hair says. “You don’t need to make anything for me without prior warning.”

“Oh, no, don’t worry about it!” Mom is practically radiating sunshine now, her whole body tipped up in the presence of two polite kids trying to appease her. “I’ll leave you to it!” She backs out, shutting the door quietly behind her, leaving the two of them in total darkness.

The moment she’s gone, Red Hair crosses his arms. Ken spins his chair to face him.

“Ichijouji Ken,” Red Hair says quietly. “My name is Izumi Kōshirō. We talked on the phone a few days ago.”

“Of course.” Is he about to get beat up in his own house? Yelled at? Lectured? Have more tokens of friendship thrown at him? Ken isn’t sure which would be worse. “About the bomb.”

“Well – technically not a bomb, it’s more of a, well, bombs don’t have power sources, it’s more like – “ Kōshirō cuts himself off with a sigh. “…yes. Sorry. I do that.”

Ken stares. So Kōshirō’s…not here to beat him up. “It’s no trouble. Please, sit down.”

Kōshirō glances around for just a moment before he sees the spare desk chair, spinning it and sitting down, recrossing his arms the moment he can. “So,” Kōshirō says. “I apologize for the inconvenience of showing up without warning, and should we have contact in the future I’ll try to be more accommodating, but I wanted to make sure you couldn’t prepare beforehand for meeting me.”

“You – “ Ken blinks. “Why?”

Kōshirō allows himself a rueful smile. “I’m sorry to break this to you,” he says, and his voice is not unkind, “but even though Daisuke-kun trusts you, most of us…don’t. Especially the original DigiDestined. It’s nothing personal, it’s just – well, it is personal, because of SkullGreymon – “ Ken winces – “sorry – but we just. We aren’t as flexible as the younger kids are. Maybe it’s the age difference, maybe it’s the experiences. Either way.” Kōshirō shrugs. “You played the part of a gentle student very well when you were a megalomaniacal emperor, and I would rather be safe than sorry.”

“I understand,” Ken says. “Honestly, I’m more surprised the DigiDestined my age don’t take that stance.” _Or a harder one,_ he thinks.

“They’re nicer than we are,” Kōshirō says, and though he’s smiling Ken doesn’t miss the cold cut of his gaze.

Ken shifts. “So why are you here?”

Kōshirō sighs, leaning forward. “A few reasons,” he says. “One – that form of Digivolving which resulted in Paildramon. Jogress. I have some information about it, but I had no way to share it with you, and since you were directly involved it seemed unfair to leave you out of the loop.”

“Oh, Paildramon!” Minomon jumps up on the bed. “That was fun! What do you know about – “

“Minomon!” Ken hisses, standing.

“Oh,” Minomon says, dismayed. “Oh, I forgot the rule about when someone’s in the room, oh no – “

“It’s fine,” Ken says, already wincing at his own outburst of tone. “Don’t worry about it, Izumi-san knows. Just – “ He runs a hand through his hair. “Be more careful in the future, okay?”

“You betcha!” Minomon chirps, hanging just long enough over the bed that he can wave at a faintly amused-looking Kōshirō, who takes the time to wave back. “Sorry for interrupting!”

“It’s no problem,” Kōshirō reassures, and his voice is just a hint warmer talking to Minomon than it was with Ken – but then he turns back. “I’d rather put that off, to be honest,” he says, voice fading back to serious. “There’s something else I’m here for. Since the new DigiDestined are preoccupied with the dark towers on your information, the older DigiDestined have taken over rebuilding. But in between, I’m still working on a very serious theory.”

Ken waits, just a moment. He’s getting the sense Kōshirō likes dramatic explanatory pauses.

Kōshirō keeps his quiet eyes on Ken. “Have you ever heard of the Dark Ocean?”

+x+

“You’re bailing on us again?” Yamato says a few weeks later, eyebrows quirked.

“It’s a very important theory,” Kōshirō says, busying himself with stuffing his notebooks into his backpack. “And getting information from Ichijouji-kun is…an experience, at the best of times. Plus, I’m watching Poromon for Miyako-kun starting tomorrow, so I’d like to do what I can before that.”

“I guess that’s fair.” Yamato’s smile is wan and brief. “Just…you’ve been working a lot on this. Be careful how far you push yourself, okay? Take a break if you need.”

“Yamato-san, please,” Kōshirō snorts, zipping his bag and shouldering it.

“Don’t you Yamato-san me,” Yamato scolds, walking him out of the classroom. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten the hospital incident.”

“You’ll never let any of us forget the hospital incident,” Kōshirō mutters under his breath. “I appreciate your concern, but I have it under control. I hope you three have a lot of fun tonight.”

“Kōshirō-kun.” Yamato grabs his arm before he can evade the situation. Kōshirō turns, blinking, to find Yamato’s eyes fixed on him.

After a moment of silence, he bites Yamato’s dramatic bullet. “Yes?”

“Do you trust him?” Yamato’s voice is quieter now – in fear, Kōshirō thinks suddenly, that Taichi or Sora might overhear. “Ichijouji-kun. Do you think he really regrets it? All those things he did? That he really means well?”

Kōshirō looks up.

The darkness, oppressive, casting shadows over every action, every thought, caves and oceans, tides and holes. Working alone; being manipulated by someone, somewhere, to twisted ends to fight the people who should be his friend.

Oh, no.

Kōshirō has been careless in his research again.

“I…” Kōshirō hesitates, because he wants to tell Yamato what he wants to hear, wants to say _yes,_ wants to say _he is better and so are you,_ wants to make it better, but – 

\- but he can’t stop seeing Taichi’s _face_ when he heard about SkullGreymon –

“Yamato-kun! Kōshirō-kun!” Sora hollers, and they both look up to find her waving wildly at them, strolling with Taichi from the conditioning room.

Kōshirō looks back up, and Yamato is still looking at him, raw and vulnerable and like he’s eleven years old again, walking away from a group with the stench of death on all their jackets.

“I don’t know,” he admits, and it sounds like an insult against himself. “I wish I could tell you, but I – I really don’t know. Not yet.”

Yamato studies him for another long moment. Then he nods and releases his grip on Kōshirō’s arm. “Thank you for being honest,” he says, and his voice is quiet but not biting, and Kōshirō thinks maybe he didn’t mess this one up.

“Hey, what’re you two being all weird about?” Taichi says as the group finally comes together. Sora sidles up next to Yamato and does the silly middle school crush Standing Sort Of Close Together And Pretending Not To Notice song and dance, to which Taichi immediately rolls his eyes and throws an arm over Kōshirō’s shoulder, throwing Sora the meaningful _get on with it you nerd_ look that has been causing fights between them since bad birthday gift number one.

“Nothing,” Yamato says, stuffing his hands in his pockets to shrug. “So are you heading out, then, Koushirou?”

“You’re not coming again?” Sora says, head whipping to look at him.

“I have a lot of work to do on my theory regarding the Dark Ocean,” Kōshirō says, but finds he can’t quite look her in the eye. She isn’t quite the same level of motherly as Yamato is, but she feels worse to let down, somehow. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you beforehand.”

“What – no, Kōshirō, come on!” Taichi whines, pulling his arm back to punch his shoulder. “You’re gonna leave me alone to get beat up by these two?”

“I’m sure you’ll manage,” Kōshirō says, voice dry.

“It isn’t good for you to work so much without a break,” Sora says. Kōshirō resists the urge to roll his eyes at them by instead rolling his eyes at Taichi, who pats his shoulder consolingly.

“They’ll get off your back if you come,” he offers. When Kōshirō bites his lip in thought, his face lights up. “And…I’ll buy you pizza?”

Kōshirō shoots him a suspicious look. “Are you choosing the toppings?”

“I’m paying for it!”

“And your taste in food is atrocious.”

“From the guy who puts ponzu on eggs.”

“I still stand by that! If you ever tried new things – “

“My best friend is a dinosaur that breathes fire, I’m pretty sure I’ve tried enough new things for a lifetime – “

Sora slowly steers the bickering boys in the direction of Taichi’s apartment, and – when met with no resistance from Kōshirō – grins and gives Yamato a double thumbs up. He takes the chance to roll his eyes, but he’s smiling, anyway.


	8. Immediately After Qinglongmon

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH,” Kōshirō yells.

“I love being friends with you,” Takeru says, but he doubts Kōshirō hears him between frantically yelling excited nonsense and rushing between his laptop and the whiteboard, already half-filled with complex equations, distantly related names, and what appears to be a short recipe for eggs written out in kanji, binary, and digicode.

“Explain this to me again,” Taichi says, and the full group – all eleven DigiDestined congregated in the old computer room, perched on various chairs circled against the wall, with Jō rapid-fire texting Mimi everything as it happens – turn back to look at him. “BlackWarGreymon is no longer a threat because…? What, because he was _sad?”_

“Basically, yeah,” Daisuke says. He’s on edge – arm pressed up against Ken’s, half-defensive, like he’s ready for a fight if anyone glances at the kid. Ken, to his credit, looks like he’s about to drown in the embarrassment of being mothered. “It’s more like…I mean, he knew he had a soul, but I don’t think he really understood what that meant? In terms of, like, morality and stuff? And I think being faced with a God kind of threw that into perspective for him.”

“Was he really faced with a God, though?” Takeru throws out there. “I mean, he was super powerful, yeah, but…a God?”

“That spirit during the Dark Masters nonsense,” Yamato says. “The glowing one. She said the Digital World didn’t have gods, right?”

“It has angels, though,” Sora points out. “For whatever reason, religion is a part of the Digital World. Whether or not it’s actually a god, it makes sense that the Digimon might worship it as one. That would probably affect BlackWarGreymon the same way.”

“Izumi-san, do you…need help?” Miyako says, looking half-uncertain. They all look back at Kōshirō.

“No.” Kōshirō squints at his computer. “Yes. Wait, no. Wait. Yes. Iori-kun.”

Iori stops pretending that he hasn’t had one eye on whatever Kōshirō’s doing this entire time and clambers over. He leans in to examine the computer more closely, the pair of them starting to trade hushed excited mutters. “Having fun over there?” Taichi calls, and while he’s keeping up the I’m-The-Leader-And-I’m-Disappointed-You-Aren’t-Listening-To-Me vibe, it’s not hard to see the faint amusement shining through.

Kōshirō looks up. “This is the best day of my entire life,” he says, voice totally deadpan, and then looks back down at his equation, shouts “OH!” and yanks an excited Iori over to the whiteboard, where he starts to scribble another line of incomprehensible whatever, explaining rapid-fire to his smiling protégé.

“He told me he’d start doing his homework on time this week,” Jō says, taking a brief break from his nonstop texting to look dismayed. “He _promised.”_

“He wasn’t going to get it done anyway and you know it,” Yamato says, and they’re talking about Kōshirō but he’s got his eye on his little brother. Takeru’s been…different, since he got back. Quicker to smile at Ken. Voice less violent when he mentions BlackWarGreymon.

All the kids changed after Jogress Evolving. Hell, Yamato is pretty sure that he and Taichi changed after evolving to Omegamon, and they didn’t even know what was going on at the time. It’s just strange, seeing it in your sibling.

“Anyway,” Sora says, and they all turn back to face each other as a group, “Let’s figure out where we need to go from here. Can we set up protections around the seeds for the new Holy Stones to make sure nothing else disturbs them as they’re growing?”

“We still need to keep taking down Dark Towers, too,” Ken pipes up, and his hands are shaking but his voice is strong, and Daisuke squeezes his shoulder comfortingly.

“Mimi thinks we should try to get in contact with all of the other DigiDestined around the world,” Jō pipes up. “See if they know anything, and start really getting some sort of system going to keep in touch globally.”

Almost as one, they all turn to Taichi, who is sitting back, arms crossed, nodding slowly at the ideas pouring in. It takes him a moment to realize that his leader mantle is being elevated once more, but when he does, he straightens his back out, giving them all a serious look. “Those are all really good ideas,” he says. “And eventually, I think, we need to get to all of them. But first…”

They wait a moment. “First?” Daisuke prompts, when Taichi appears to be lost and thought.

Abruptly, he grins. “First, let’s celebrate!” He stands up, stretching lightly. “I’ll buy pizza and we can play Smash or have a movie marathon or something. We’ve earned it.”

“Hell yeah!” Daisuke hops up, grinning. “Ken, come on, you have to see Taichi-san’s game collection, it is so sweet.”

“I – “ Ken shoots the group a bewildered, slightly frightened look. “Are you sure that, that I – “

“Everyone’s invited,” Taichi promises, and the older kids all have their knuckles tight against their seats but Daisuke and Miyako both slap Ken on the back.

“Get ready to get beat!” Miyako crows. “Izumi-san and I coordinated all of the Smash tournaments for the computer club fundraisers. I’ll kick your ass!”

“Not if I kick his ass first!” Daisuke argues, jerking in front of them.

“Sounds like neither of you have ever seen Hikari play,” Takeru interjects, grinning. All four of them turn to look at Hikari, who is bashfully pretending not to notice their conversation.

Sora touches a hand to Kōshirō’s elbow. “Are you two going to come?” Sora says, glancing between him and Iori.

Kōshirō flaps a hand in her general direction. “Gimme a minute.” He yanks his notebook into reach from where it’s perched on the edge of the table, scrabbling for a moment to grab the pen. “So if Qinglongmon is east, and he’s a dragon, but he’s also a spirit, then if we look at Angemon…”

Sora shakes her head at Jō, who sighs and pockets his phone, condemning himself to figuring out speakerphone later that evening, when Mimi would be ‘all slumber-partied up’. “Iori?” Takeru says, popping his head over.

Iori hesitates for a moment, glancing between Kōshirō’s frantic calculation and Takeru’s hopeful expression. “I…” he starts. Takeru gives him puppy dog eyes. Iori sighs. “Fine,” he relents, and Takeru whoops, dragging him to tail after the other four of their group, who have begun arguing over Samus strats as they make their way down the hallway. Yamato begins to drag Jō off behind them, and Sora takes a moment to glance meaningfully between Taichi and Kōshirō before she follows, shouting to throw her lot in on the impromptu Mario vs Peach debate.

Taichi hesitates a moment. “Kōshirō,” he starts, cautious.

Though he’d been totally unresponsive to Sora before, Kōshirō actually looks up and smiles for Taichi, something that makes his heart flutter a little weird and gross in his chest for some reason. “I know you don’t believe me,” he says, “but I promise, I will actually be along in a few minutes. I understand what you’re trying to do for morale, I just need to wrap up this equation I’m on.”

The bunched up muscles in Taichi’s shoulders relax, and he lets out a breath. He had been – inanely – worried that Kōshirō would think he was being silly, or just trying to avoid the big questions with this – but – of course Kōshirō gets it. If anyone…of course he gets it.

Taichi rests a hand on Kōshirō’s shoulder, and his smile is warm, like his crest and the sun. “Don’t take too long, okay?” he warns. “Or I’ll eat your pizza.”

“Good,” Kōshirō snorts, and Taichi grins before he heads out after the rest of the team, content in the knowledge that Kōshirō would be following after them soon.


	9. Taichi's First Year of College

Taichi expects to be angry meeting the Poi brothers. Hikari had mentioned – in her Hikari way, where she didn’t quite grasp their perspective, thought they were just really nice – had mentioned that they all tried to ask her on a date, back when they were in elementary school, and if every boy she’s ever met since is any indication, then he hadn’t been super optimistic about the chances they’d grow out of that. And, you know, he’s right.

He doesn’t expect his main distraction from that to be Catherine, of all people. They’d met once before, in France, and kissed each other’s cheeks as a sort of joke, but she’s been enthusiastically clinging to his side all night. Maybe it’s just the allure of actually knowing someone. Taichi wouldn’t be surprised – there’s a staggering number of what he’s come to call second-generation DigiDestined, enough that even though it’s meant to be a socializing event, it’s hard not to stick with the people you know.

That doesn’t make it less exhausting, though. He finally convinces her to introduce herself to a small group of extremely polite Americans and collapses on a chair across from Kōshirō and Jō, who have spent the entire evening playing cards and not socializing at all, the bastards. “Hngajsh,” he says intelligibly.

“The sound of a broken man,” Jō says, not looking up from his hand. “Gin.”

“Again?” Kōshirō demands. Jō lays his cards flat on the table and Kōshirō groans, throwing his hand down. “I was only one away! How did you get so good at this?”

“By playing games that aren’t on my computer,” Jō says, wry, pulling the cards into a pile to shuffle them. “Want me to deal you in, Taichi-kun? Give you an excuse to stay off your feet for a few minutes.”

“I don’t know that I have the energy.” Jō makes a sympathetic noise as Taichi sets his blank stare on the table. “Like. Okay. I get it. But also. Like.” He makes a vague, extremely unhelpful gesture to nothing. “Blah.”

“At least she’s pretty,” Kōshirō offers, pulling his glass of water up and taking a sip.

“Yeah, if you’re into girls,” Taichi mutters, and Kōshirō promptly chokes.

He turns away from the table, hacking up what sounds like both of his lungs and at least a third of his esophagus, and takes a long gulp of water to wash down all the water he just swallowed. He sits up a minute later, face glowing red, with two pairs of eyes on him. “I’m sorry,” he says, voice hoarse, “could you run that by me again?”

“Could – “ Taichi thinks back, and his brain short circuits. “Oh,” he says. “Oh my god. I never officially came out to you.”

“No, I don’t think it ever came up in our conversations!” Koushirou trills.

“Really?” Jou blinks. “When he came out to me, he said I was the last one.”

_“Taichi-san!”_

“I thought you already knew!” Taichi puts his hands up in innocence. “You’re all observational and shit, plus you came out as bi like two weeks after I finished telling everyone so I figured it was in response, I didn’t realize that I like – I thought it just – went without saying - you know – “ He gestures wildly.

“You thought it went without saying that you're _gay?”_ Kōshirō says.

They stare at each other for a long, long moment.

The realization hits both of them at the same time.

“We can never, ever let Sora know about this,” Taichi says.

“Or Mimi-chan,” Kōshirō says.

“Or Yamato.”

“Or Takeru-kun.”

“Or Miyako.”

“No one can ever find out.”

“Jō.” Taichi turns and gives Jō his best I’m-Your-Leader-Don’t-Tell-Anyone-About-The-Stupid-Shit-I-Just-Did look. “Jō, I need to swear you to secrecy right now. Promise me you won’t ever tell anyone this happened. Swear it. On Gomamon’s life. You can’t tell, Jō.”

“Uh,” Jō says, phone out.

Kōshirō has his face buried in his hands. “You just texted it to the group chat,” he says.

“I just texted it to the group chat,” Jō admits.

Taichi groans and lets his head fall onto the table. He rubs his eyes. He pulls out his phone.

_WHAT DO YOU MEAN TAICHI’S GAY – Meiko_

“Fuck my life,” Taichi says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: i'm going to focus on miyakari this month for femslash february! me: immediately, without pause, comes up with 8000 stories centering around taishiro
> 
> ON ANOTHER NOTE, i am ACTUALLY GOING TO BREAK AFTER THIS ONE FINGERS CROSSED, because i do have hella miyakaris i want to get done before the end of the month i just. hnngh. my Boys.
> 
> i do feel like im finally getting a handle on characterization tho!! which is good, because that was sort of my Secret Plan All Along with this collection, just to get a handle on writing the characters & dynamics so that when i finally set aside the time to write one of the longer fics i already have my footing. one step closer to that explain-the-epilogue-without-making-everyone-straight series ive always Dreamed of.


	10. Tri: Kohaku (V 2.0 Sorta)

_“He’s investigating this with all his heart…he says it’s all he can do.”_

Taichi visits, again, after school, dropping his back at the door. “You might as well just tell me all the passcodes at this point, if I’m gonna live here,” he says, forcing a grin on his face.

“Taichi-san!” Agumon jumps into his arms.

Taichi only barely catches him in time. “Agumon! What are you doing out of the server room?”

“We all came out when Jō and Takeru visited!” he chirps, nuzzling his head against Taichi’s chest. The Digimon have all gotten more physically affectionate over the years, but Taichi is pretty sure Agumon is the heaviest of them – except, maybe, Gabumon. “I thought you’d come back, so I stayed!”

Taichi grins despite himself. “I don’t know how safe that is, but I’m glad,” he admits, giving his best friend a quick squeeze before setting him down and turning to the giant, elusive, red-haired elephant in the room.

“You know, Nishijima asked after you today,” Taichi says, nudging the all the empty tea bottles aside to hop up on the edge of Kōshirō’s desk.

Anyone else, Kōshirō would’ve had a breakdown about disturbing his workspace. Taichi, and Kōshirō just gives him a deadpan look before he turns back to his typing. The bags under his eyes haven’t gotten any better since yesterday. “I don’t expect he told you any of the things he and Himekawa-san have been hiding from us for no reason?” he says, and there’s a tinge of bitterness in his voice. “Or that he got in contact with Gennai-san. Not that Gennai-san would do anything but put us further in the dark, either.”

Taichi leans back on his arms. “He says he’s afraid you’re going to be able to build a small apartment out of all the homework you’re missing.”

Kōshirō smiles despite himself. “I’d say this is a little more important than calculus right now, Taichi-san.”

The computer makes a beeping noise like an alarm clock and Kōshirō jerks back like he’s been hit, snarling at his computer. “Can’t you change that sound? It can’t be good to hear every you time something goes wrong,” Taichi says, leaning around to see the top computer screen – a string of NO RESULT boxes that makes his heart sink.

“It’d be a waste of time,” Kōshirō mutters, squinting darkly at a string of binary before he sets back to it.

“The way that sleeping is a waste of time?” Kōshirō doesn’t respond. “Or eating something? Or going outside?”

“Thanks, Jō-san,” Kōshirō bites, but Taichi just leans in a little closer.

“Kōshirō,” he says, and touches a hand to Kōshirō’s collar – right where he knows it’ll remind him, of Mugendramon, of the hospital, of the confession. “Talk to me.”

Finally – finally – Kōshirō pushes his chair back and looks up at Taichi.

He's about to cry.

Taichi stands, off the desk and pulls his hand down to rest on the arm of the chair, watching Kōshirō’s face. “I’m just – “ Kōshirō breaks off to rest his face in his hands. “I’m so tired of everything being kept secret from us! What does it accomplish? It’s such a waste of time, if they would just say what they know I might be done by now, or at least have a lead – we’ve saved the Digital World seven times, we stopped the fucking apocalypse twice, what more could it possibly take before they start to fucking trust us!”

Oh, wow. Brought out the curse words. That isn’t a good sign. “Kōshirō…”

“I mean, at the very least I could take a break!” Kōshirō drops his hands into his lap but doesn’t look up. “I wouldn’t have to play catch-up with a bunch of people who only think we’re worth their time when it’s to beat up whatever Digimon they can’t kill on sight! Because – why? Because we’re in high school? Because – “

He falters. His hands tighten into fists, and Taichi can see it in his face that now they’re both thinking of Mugendramon again but not hospital Mugendramon, he’s thinking of bombs Mugendramon, he’s thinking of Kōshirō screaming _Why won’t you let me fight?_ across an empty field and _The bombs were my fault_ and he is thinking of SkullGreymon and all the mistakes Taichi is made and he grabs Kōshirō’s hand and yells, “That’s not it at all!”

Kōshirō looks up at him, sharp. “They aren’t telling you because of anything you did!” Taichi says, and his hands are tight in Kōshirō’s grip. “I – I don’t know why they’re keeping whatever else they know from us, but either it’s because they need to or because they’re assholes. Neither of those – none of that is your fault. You’re right, it’s stupid that they don’t trust you, and it sucks.”

Kōshirō stares up at him for a moment.

His gaze goes – soft. His hand inexplicably tightens in Taichi’s grip.

“I’m sorry,” he says, bowing his head briefly, but even though he still looks exhausted enough to drop the moment Taichi lets go of him, the worry lines have uncreased a little on his forehead, he’s smiling just a little, soft. “I'm sorry I can't do any more than what I'm doing. And I…perhaps. I was being insensitive again.” A short silence. “Thank you.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Taichi squeezes his hand. “I don’t know what it’s worth, because I say a lot of stuff without thinking, but…I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong. With Meiko-san, or with this, or anything. I’m behind you. All the way.”

“I know,” Kōshirō smiles, and Taichi lets go of his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey remember that time i wrote something for this episode of tri forever ago and then deleted it from the earlier chapters so i could post this better drabble with a similar concept.........me neither. crazy
> 
> im actually not done with any of the 02-era stuff (or the adventure-era stuff, or the between-shows stuff, or the leading-up-to-the-epilogue-era stuff), but im suffering through tri again (which is way worse the second time now that i thoroughly understand the characters, lemme tell you) so i can officially say ive powered through a rewatch of all three shows in rapid succession, and i really wanted to do this scene now that i Understood The Motivations (TM), so i'm throwin it out there. sorry if you were expecting something good. go read kasuutan for that. im just here to suffer
> 
> ideally, i'd like to get out that dumb silly valentine's day headcanon from a little while back On Valentine's Day, and then it's back to the real meat of this ridiculous fairly meat-less story: Making Fun Of Jou And Yamato At Various Inappropriate Times.


	11. 2013 [ages 25 and 24]

“Listen, I don’t know why you’re so hung up on this, you asked my opinion and I gave it – “

“It’s been fourteen years, Taichi-san!” Kōshirō snaps, whirling on his heel to set Taichi with a cold stare – and it’s not like Kōshirō’s never been mad at Taichi, but this is different, trembling gaze trembling hands trembling lips. “How long is it going to take before you start thinking of me as an equal?!”

“Wha – “ Taichi’s head snaps back, full body recoil setting him wobbly against the floor. They’re in a bad place for this discussion, in public in a government building, Kōshirō weighing the benefits and detriments of his newest job offer, the one that takes him into totally unknown territory with – with who knows what Digimon, it’s fucking dangerous – “I’ve always thought of you as an equal!”

“Bullshit!” Kōshirō’s fists are clenched the way they never get, not in all of the almost-fights they’ve had in all their years of knowing each other. “You’ve never treated me like an equal – not when we were fighting Piemon and you wouldn’t let me fight, not when you kept going to the Digital World without telling me because apparently I’m useless out in the field – “

“I didn’t do that because I didn’t respect you!”

“Then what the fuck, Taichi-san, because if you’ve got another explanation I’d love to hear it!” Kōshirō’s voice is cracking the way it hasn’t in years, not since the Reboot mess, and they are having a very different argument now. “There were times you could’ve died, and you still refused to let me be involved! If you didn’t think I was too weak to help, then what the hell happened, because I’m drawing a huge blank over here!”

“I didn’t want you to get hurt!” Taichi’s got his hands balled into fists – not anger. Tension. Stress. “Of course you could handle yourself, Kōshirō, we probably wouldn’t have even gotten to Server if you didn’t – I was worried about you anyway, idiot!”

“Oh, but you weren’t worried about Yamato!” Taichi’s not sure which of them stepped closer, but they’re railing up against each other’s personal space, almost-but-not-quite ready to fight should it come to it. “When he got there, there was no issue! Or Sora! Or Takeru, who was _eight!_ The only other person you treated like that was Hikari, who hadn’t ever been to the Digital World before, so if you want to stop lying to me – “

“That’s because I cared about you different than I cared about them!”

And Taichi thinks that’s going to be the end of it, because Kōshirō’s usually a pretty observant guy, but apparently he’s too angry to remember what social cues are right now because he keeps going, “Oh, what a nice way to put that you thought I needed protecting, very good Taichi-san, but if you pulled your head out of your ass – “

Before he knows what he’s doing, Taichi’s slams Kōshirō against the wall, one hand yanking him up by the collar of his shirt and the other slammed palm-first next to his head.

He doesn’t say anything. For a moment, they’re utterly still, the hallway silent except for the hum of the air conditioning, Kōshirō’s face twisted up and expressionless like he’s ready for any punch that comes his way.

Taichi’s grip on his collar relaxes.

“I’ve never told anyone else,” he says, “about the hospital.”

Kōshirō stares at him. “…what?”

It’s the sort of gaze that makes Taichi want to lean away, to repent and blame himself and let Kōshirō softly reassure him back to the way things were, but he doesn’t want things back to the way they were, he wants Kōshirō to understand. “The hospital. With Hikari. I’ve never told anyone about it. Sora doesn’t know. Yamato doesn’t know. Fuck, I never told Hideto and we were _engaged_ for a while there. Nobody.”

Taichi doesn’t know when Kōshirō’s hand came up to wrap loose around his wrist, but it’s there now, elbow pressed in awkwardly, hand on hand on collar. “Except you,” Taichi says, voice still low, still half-fighting.

“Taichi-san…”

“So it’s – I just. You have to.” Taichi makes a noise, because he’s trying but there aren’t words for it like he wants there to be. “You gotta believe me when I say that the issue isn’t that I don’t trust you. It’s not.” His voice cracks. “That’s not the fucking problem.”

Kōshirō’s eyes are still blank but it’s a different way, this time, one that’s dark and curious and wants to listen. “Then what’s the problem, Taichi-san?” he says, and his voice has dropped to match Taichi’s in volume, maybe without realizing.

Taichi closes his eyes. 

He doesn’t want things to go back to the way they were. He wants Kōshirō to understand.

He wants Kōshirō to trust him.

“I’m scared,” he says, honest, resting his forehead against the wall next to Kōshirō’s head, and his voice cracks the way it hasn’t since he was just hitting puberty, and he doesn’t know how to keep going, how to say _I’m scared you’ll figure out how worthless I am and leave me,_ how to say _I’m scared you won’t come back and then no one will know me and I’ll be all alone,_ how to say _I’m scared you’ll go off on one of these studies without me and I’ll find your body and it’ll be something I could’ve stopped if I’d been there._ He can’t. Say it. “I’m – I’m. I just.” He takes a deep breath.

“Kōshirō,” he says, “you know that time I almost died because I didn’t want you to get involved?”

“Vividly,” Kōshirō says, and his voice is both breathless and dry, a combination Taichi’s never heard anyone else pull off.

“Right.” Taichi breathes in. “The problem is, I can’t stop worrying about you doing the same thing.”

They stand there in silence for a moment. Then – Kōshirō touches his face.

Taichi does his best not to rear too far back at the touch. They’d been close, physically, when they were younger – like, weird close, as in No Wonder Taichi Fell Head Over Heels When He Was Like Eleven close – but they’d mostly dropped off in high school and ceased for the whole period Taichi dated Hideto, acclimating to the social boundaries of the world. It’s been a while since Kōshirō’s done more than brush hands with him. He’s missed it – like he’s touch starved, but just for one person.

“You,” Kōshirō says, fingers just barely brushing against Taichi’s cheekbones, just enough to get him to keep eye contact, “are a giant hypocrite.”

And before Taichi can say anything, Kōshirō pulls him into a hug, burying his expression in Taichi’s shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it occurred to me that most of these were dialed up on koushiro's Inner Turmoil (TM) w/ less emphasis on taichi's and i just so happened to have most of this piece drawn up from where i was first doing a full-blown analyzation of the dynamic. even if i didnt have the headcanon that all the digidestined worked together as political pro-digimon activists in addition to/as part of their day jobs, taichi and koushiro's jobs are really closely related, which means theres plenty of time & space to explore all that relationship turmoil and development from mugendramon/vamdemon that neVER GOT ADDRESSED, WE ARE NOW THREE SERIES' INTO THIS TOEI, WHAT THE FUCK
> 
> i actually like to think the saibas and alias iii are the five original digidestined, which means that any taichi/hideto Would Not Be A Thing, but for the sake of this little self-contained series of ficlets it serves its purpose as a measure of taichi and koushiro's relationship strength. also as a means to Angst later maybe. probably not because that isnt really the life im about. but Maybe
> 
> i do really like this piece, but im finally figurin out the direction i want to take the bigger projects i have in mind and this scene doesnt really fit into a place in any of them, so im glad i can throw it up here. still expect the valentines day headcanon one tho hopefully! fingers crossed ill be able to throw that one down on paper on time. on keyboard. w/ever


	12. 2016-ish

Three days after Hideto leaves for the second time, Taichi wakes up to find Kōshirō sitting on the floor, carefully folding the laundry he forgot to start last night.

Taichi doesn’t even move for a moment, just stares stupid at Kōshirō’s hands, the way the pink nail polish Ken and Miyako’s daughter painted on weeks ago is only just starting to chip, the way he’s got the dark blue sleeves of his hoodie pushed up to his elbows like he’s doing some sort of hard labor. He’s totally concentrated – on most people, they looked stressed when they’re focused, but for Kōshirō it’s when he looks most relaxed, totally immersed in whatever he’s doing.

Kōshirō finally seems to sense the shift in the air and looks up, catching Taichi’s eyes in his own. “Ah, Taichi-san,” he says, setting aside Taichi’s khakis on the desk chair. “Did I wake you? I tried to be quiet.”

“No,” Taichi says, and he still hasn’t moved, just. Looking. “I mean – no, you didn’t wake me. You did my laundry?”

“It needed doing.” Kōshirō stands up. Taichi does not watch the way his legs stretch out underneath him – still the same kid that saved his life when they were eleven, saving his life now, sort of, but not, neither of those things in any way. “I rescheduled all of your meetings for the day, so you’ll have a three-day weekend. Jō has been calling every single break he gets to ask how you’re doing, so you are answering him next time, because if I have to speak to him any more I will die.”

Taichi sits up, rubbing his eyes with the weight of his palms. “You shouldn’t have cancelled my stuff,” he yawns, letting his arms fall to rest in the puddle of blanket on his lap. “Politics doesn’t take breaks.”

“Well, it’s lucky you’re a human being instead of the concept of politics, then.” Kōshirō sits on the side of the bed, weight gentle, just barely disturbing the mattress. “I’ve already contacted Agumon. I assumed you would like to spend time with him, since you have time off.”

Taichi stares at his hands. It would be good to hang out with Agumon, now, but…

“It’ll be good for you to leave your house,” Kōshirō says at Taichi’s expression. “You can’t hide in here forever.”

“I can try,” Taichi says. Kōshirō rolls his eyes and Taichi throws himself back into the mattress, yanking the blanket back over his head. “Well, then, fuck you, too!” he hisses. “Nobody asked you to be here.”

There is a long moment of silence. The mattress doesn’t move. The clock ticks.

Taichi pulls the blanket back off of him.

“…sorry,” he says, rolling on his side, so he doesn’t have to face Kōshirō.

“Taichi-san,” Kōshirō says, resting a hand on his leg, and Taichi curls up closer into himself and says, “I’m sorry, fuck.”

The bed does shift, this time, and when Taichi looks up to see if Kōshirō’s leaving it’s to find Kōshirō’s face inches from his own, crouched on the floor next to him so that Taichi looks him in the eyes. “You have done nothing wrong,” Kōshirō says.

Taichi’s fingers go tight in the sheets. “If I’d listened to you in the first place, when you said not to go out with him again, I wouldn’t even be in this mess,” he says, voice throaty and raw and tight in bad ways. “And I’m yelling at you when you’re just – you’re only trying to – I’m sorry, I’m bad, fuck.”

“Taichi-san.” Kōshirō grabs Taichi’s hand, turns their palms against each other so that Taichi is clinging tight to his fingers instead of the sheets. _“You have done nothing wrong.”_

They are still, for a moment.

Taichi looks away. “…thank you,” he says, instead of _sorry,_ and Kōshirō smiles.

“Don’t worry about it.” He squeezes Taichi’s hand once, quick, and lets it fall back to the mattress, lax now as Taichi’s body slowly unfurls. “I’m going to go grab breakfast. Then you can get changed and we’ll head to the Digital World, okay?”

“Yeah.” Yeah. Okay. One step at a time.

By the time Taichi mutters, “Fuck, I don’t deserve you,” Kōshirō is already out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> koushiro and yamato have matching t-shirts that read "taichi did nothing wrong" and "taichi did some things wrong" and That's Just Canon, Buddy
> 
> been thinking a lot about epilogue era taishiro lately. have a few more half-written drabbles that i'll probs get around to finishing sometime soon, but idk when, sorry T_T


End file.
